The original Destroy All Humans! will always have a special place in my twisted little heart. Cryptosporidium 137’s maniacal quest to conquer America for the Furon empire remains a hilarious jaunt. While Black Forest Games 2020 effort was the kind of pitch-perfect remake the pint-sized homicidal alien deserved.
Now two years later, Black Forest is back with the sequel, the delightful Destroy All Humans! 2: Reprobed.
Though it’s a decent sequel with solid mechanics, some parts of the writing and performances haven’t aged very well. It seems Black Forest Games are aware of this if the content warning in the opening credits is anything to go on, which begs the question – why didn’t they change it?
Set in the swinging 60s, Destroy All Humans! 2 sees Crypto going on a globe-trotting adventure to get revenge on the KGB after they blow up his mothership and kill Pox. Stranding Crypto on Earth. How is ‘Mr. President’ going to stick it to the Commies? Level Russia with his flying saucer? Disintegrate hundreds of secret agents with your Raygun? Nope, he creates a sex cult based on the ancient teachings of the Furon God Arkvoodle. Oh, and blows everything up because old habits die hard.
In many ways, Destroy All Humans! 2 is the perfect sequel as it expands and refines the foundations laid by the original while meaningfully furthering the narrative.
The problem is that the narrative is essentially an early 2000s sex comedy about an alien trying to get his end away with a voluptuous Russian spy. Think Mars Attacks meets Austin Powers, and you’re not far from the mark. A Mike Myres, Tim Burton mash-up, I hear you cry? Fantastic, and for the best part, it is, except when it wanders into The Guru territory. One character that was Indian in the original and is white in Reprobed, not sure if it makes it better or worse, speaks in the voice. You know the one. I’m looking at You Apu. It was cringy then, and it feels even worse now.
The other jokes have faired a little better, especially the gags during the level set in London. Sorry, Albion. Random angry citizens blaming Labour for Crypto’s latest rampage still seems particularly relevant. The Conservatives heralding an improvement in water quality after police drag a dead body out of the Thames is also depressingly on brand.
Creating Mayhem as Crypto with his expanding arsenal of gadgets, guns and powers to lay waste to those pitiful humans is still tons of fun. Fan favourite weapons from the first game return – including the Anal Probe and Zappomatic. But Crypto has some new tricks too. These include a gun that makes people and vehicles bounce and an anti-gravity field for his saucer. But chucking hapless humans skywards with PK remains my favourite way of causing panic among the populace.
Each area is compact and well constructed, and whether you are advancing the story in the main missions, expanding your cult and upgrading your weapons in various side quests, or sucking up unsuspecting humans in your flying saucer to upgrade your powers, there’s always plenty to do.
The stealth elements from the first game have been refined and are not so irksome. Now, rather than having to run away as soon as he’s rumbled, Crypto can use a groovy new gadget that makes everyone dance. The distraction this causes lets you quickly snatch a new disguise (read: body) and go about your business.
Getting from one end of the map to the other is quicker than in the PS2 version, thanks to the return of Crypto’s new dodge and hoverboard abilities from the 2020 remake. The Jet pack seems to carry you further too.
Although the maps do seem to be a little more compact than the vast fields and coastal towns of Destroy All Humans!, what they lose in acreage they more than make up for in variety; from ‘Murica to Blighty to the Land of the Rising Sun, each new area and its inhabitants feel distinct and unique.
Although the saucer missions have been dialled back. The ship handles better, while the ability to aim all your weapons straight beneath you is a godsend, especially during sections where you need to carry objects or abduct people.
Some of the gags may be stuck in the past, but Black Forest Games has done a brilliant job of bringing the technical elements of Destroy All Humans! 2 bang up to date. Every part of the game has had a significant facelift. Each asset, even the UI, has been rebuilt from the ground up, and its goofy cartoon aesthetic shines. When Crypto is causing chaos, as barrels explode, KGB agents fly through the air, and lightning arcs from your zapomatic, and it looks fantastic. The only technical issue I found is the frequent pop-in during cut scenes.
But on the whole, Destroy All Humans! 2: Reprobed is a brilliant follow-up and another solid remake by Black Forest Games. If you’ve ever thought Austin Powers needed more Aliens that sound like Jack Nicolson, want to return to a simpler time, or just love causing havoc. Crypto’s cult-creating adventure may be the groove you’ve been looking for.
