WASDuk Review: Jessabelle


Film: Jessabelle

Grade: F-

Director Kevin Greutert (Saw 3D, Saw VI) knows exactly what he’s doing with this latest ghost-girl-with-long-black-hair Ringu alum. And that’s the main problem.

The minor problem is that horror films have always clung to the tag-line that they are based on true events. Lately though, a large line of terrible films claiming to be from members of the production or directorial teams of Paranormal Activity and Insidious have flooded the market and reminded everyone of why the horror genre is slowly dying: these films are complete and utter shit.

Jessabelle joins its kindred spirits and you should all be warned. Leave it on the shelf. Seek out the quality horror that’s breathing life back into the genre like Honeymoon and The Babadook.

Regardless, Kevin Greutert does what he does. Jessie (Sarah Snook) gets pregnant, watches her boyfriend die in a car accident, becomes wheelchair bound, and has to move in with her estranged father in Louisiana. That’s within the first 5 minutes of the film. The remaining 90 minutes is a long yawn of the one-night stand between Ringu and The Sixth Sense. Unlike those terrifying and profound films, respectively, Jessabelle removes the scares and forces the audience to watch its heroine crawl around on the floor a lot. Seriously, if she walked, the movie would only be 10 minutes long, and the left-over time is inflated with dialog about how her ex-boyfriend is hunting down everything from dolls to VHS tapes off-screen. Huh?

Who’s funding Kevin Greutert and these cast-off members of superior films? Hopefully, it’s not you.

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